GRADUATION!! (Grad School)

Sunday, May 11

Mother's Day

Here I sit in church this day has come around yet again. I sent my mother her Mother's day text and her gift should have been delivered. I think she will enjoy it. (Tiana or Tallie...Do we know if it was received? or what the reaction was?) There is a call scheduled for tomorrow at 7 pm to talk to my mom, today, my brother is calling from the mission field..........I figure he has primary importance. :)

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Hours have passed since I started this blog this morning. Every year this day fills me with mixed emotions. While I am grateful for a chance to celebrate my mother, whom I love, every year this day is uncomfortable for me. The weather seems to understand how I feel and want to improve my mood. I am sitting in my room with the windows open; the air is cool across my face, the strong smell of fresh rain fills the room and I can hear the steady drumming of rain on the porch roof.

I am not quite sure why today is so uncomfortable for me. I mean, long ago I recognized that the Lord had a different path for me. I knew I wouldn't be the woman who was married at 19 and have 2.5 kids. I am not one who "yearns" to be a mom.So why does Mothers Day make me wish I was that type of woman? I am pretty sure I know the answer to that question, I just don't know if I am ready to admit to it in this public of a forum.

For now I will close with a great big THANK YOU to all of the mothers in my life. From my biological mom to all of the adopted ones near and far. Thanks for all that you have done to make me the well adjusted woman I am today. ;)

2 comments:

Tiana said...

You are amazing the way you are and I love you for it! I talked to mom for a small moment right when they were sitting down for dinner...she loved the book!!!! Loved it! She cried! Well done on the idea, you are a genius!

Amy said...

It is an akward holiday isn't it? It is nice to know that I'm not the only one that feels that way. I wish I had some kind of life-changing advice to give about how to deal with it but I'm still searching for that myself.