GRADUATION!! (Grad School)

Saturday, December 29

I've gone dark side of the moon......

Do you remember those days back when you were in high school? You know Christmas or summer vacation would start and you would spend some time with no one else but your books. You would hole up in you room eating only when your hunger and a good stopping place coincided?

What you don’t remember those days…..whoops…..I guess I am again admitting that I am a geek.

Not to worry everyone…I am almost finished with the current series. I am on the last book…which I have never read before. So if I am not answering your calls or returning email or text it is not because I hate you or am ignoring you. I am just sunk in the world of Navy Seals, FBI, police detectives, terrorists, and serial killers. Good thing the good guys always win in the books, right? If only it happened in real life too.

I promise to surface before I have to be at work on Monday but don’t expect me before then.  Long live the good guys fighting for our freedom. (Darn….the acknowledgements to these books get me every time. Lol!)


P.S. If you have sent me a message; I promise to listen to it when I return to the land of the living and not a second sooner. This was just to let everyone know I am still alive.

Friday, December 28

2007 Recap:

Well another Year has passed and I thought I would re cap the same way I had last year….. Make my life easier. Lol!

JANUARY
1. Where were you on New Years Eve?
I had to check of course, but now I remember the New Years Eve party at Paul and Ellen’s. It was quite fun and definitely interesting.

2. Did you have a new year's resolution this year?
Who doesn’t….they all failed miserably…but that won’t stop me from making new ones.

3. Does it snow where you live?
It should….But it is not! It makes me want to cry.

FEBRUARY
1. Who was your Valentine?
I couldn’t find one written about on any of my blogs… I can think of a few crushes. But there wasn’t a valentine that I can remember. Again.

2. Do you care if the groundhog sees its shadow or not?
Am I supposed to? Never really thought about the poor rodent!

MARCH
1. Are you Irish?
I believe there is a trace of the Irish in the mutt blood that I have.

2. Do you wear green on St. Patty's Day?
Always! It is my favorite holiday.

3. What did you do for St. Patty's Day in 2007?
I have no idea. Did I do anything? Anyone?

4. Are you happy when winter is over?
Yes and No. I love winter but there is something about being able to walk with out the biting wind or sleet.

APRIL
1. Do you like the rain?
I love the Rain!!!

2. Did you play an April fool's joke on anyone this year?
I never got in to April Fool’s jokes…I feel bad when I make someone else feel silly.

3. Do you get tons of candy on Easter?
Not tons…but I believe there was Easter candy consumed this year. I did get this really cute bucket from this girl that was visiting from England…what was her name? She was a doll….hmmm. I’ll have to ask Gina.

4. Do you celebrate 4/20?
No

5. Do you love the month of April?
Yes! Usually……..maybe……..I don’t know. I think so.

MAY
1. What's your favorite kind of flower?
I love the Forget-me-nots. But I also love Lilacs…so much so that my mother planted them in our yard just for me!

3. Finish the phrase "April showers":
bring May flowers. What do Mayflowers bring? PILGRIMS!

4. What is the first color you think of when you think of Spring?
forget me not blue….pastel Green….

JUNE
1. What year do/did you graduate from High School?
1997.

2. Anything special happen to you in June?
I got roses for my birthday. That was huge for me. I mean…I haven’t received flowers since I was 19…I probably won’t receive them again until my late thirties. Lol! I also got to see the Riverdance perfomace and Wolf Trap. That was pretty cool. Special? Maybe…but still pretty cool.

JULY
1. What did you do on the Fourth of July?
I was in the Fourth of July parade in DC. I helped hold Cheer Bear! Way cool!! Then I slept. Lol!

2. Did you go on any vacations during this month?
My sister got married so I went home for a visit. Not quite sure it could be considered a vacation but it was nice to see everyone

AUGUST
1. Did you do anything special at the end of your summer?
I went to a church campout. It was fun.

2. What was your favorite summer memory of '06?
I think the wedding has some fun memories and the parade was definitely fun, and the birthday parties that ran rampant this year were fun.

3. Did you have a sunburn?
Yes…me and the DMV are still not friends

4. Do you go to the beach a lot?
Not once. I know I am still a little sad about that. Maybe next year. *Sigh*

SEPTEMBER
1. Did you attend college in 06?
No. I am still wishing!

2. Do you like fall better than summer?
I love the fall as much as I love the spring…Summer is probably my least favorite season, though I still like it.

OCTOBER
1. What was your favorite Halloween costume?
I still didn’t dress up this year but there were a bunch of adorable kids that came to the house this year. It was great!

2. What's your favorite candy?
I love Candy Corn.

3. What did you dress up as this year?
I didn’t….

4. Carve a pumpkin this year?
No but Jen did…of a vampire biting a girl’s neck. Which lead to a rather embarrassing moment for one of the girls when she described it as a man eating a woman…she learned something new that day. Lol!

NOVEMBER
1. Whose house do you go to for Thanksgiving?
I went to the Hinkson Family Reunion this year. $0 odd people at the church and then Grandma Hinkson’s house for Pie!

2. Do you love stuffing?
I love Stuffing! It goes with Mash Potatoes and Gravy! Oh I miss those foods. I wonder if I could make them on my own with out ruining them? Hmmmm…..

3. What are you thankful for?
Peace of Mind, Family, Good Friends, and so many other things….but mostly the people in my life, they have such an impact!

DECEMBER
1. Do you celebrate Christmas?
Yeah, this year it was subdued but very enjoyable with the Taylor family.

2. Have you ever been kissed under mistletoe?
Not that I remember. Would be nice to have happen….Anyone know when Jacob from Twilight will be standing under some Mistletoe?

3. Get anything special ?
I am calling it the year of food…almost every thing I got is attached to food some how. I look forward to filling my recipe book with recipes.

4. What did you want this year?
Well, you know….I am pretty happy with the way things turned out.

5. Do you like cold weather?
YES! I love the snow…It would figure that the one year I didn’t go home they would get the kind of snow we haven’t seen in years. *Sigh* that’s it. I am moving to Alaska!


And that is my year in review now all I have to do is figure out my new years resolutions……

Thursday, December 27

The 'I'm too lazy to really write anything' update:

  • Christmas with the Taylors......Always fun!
  • Juno with Kate....interesting.
  • 4 books read...got to love them Navy Seal stories....lol!
  • Touring the White House.....E cracks me up...I remember why I like to hang out with her.
  • German food.......my stomach, not the jury, is still awaiting the verdict. I probably should have stuck with the sausages instead of the pork
Now I am going back to my series. Hopefully, I will get to work on my quilt tomorrow! YAY!

Monday, December 24

Happy Merry Christmas Eve!!

This first one is for My Dad...who's favorite song is Pachelbel's Canon. (And Tara..who loves this version...yes they performed it on Sat.)
Christmas Canon Rock:



And this one is is just because I think it is way fun!
Wizards in Winter:

Sunday, December 23

2, 104 miles away from my family, surrounded mostly by strangers, I attended church today. This is only the second time I have spent Christmas away from my family. The first time I was a missionary, so it isn’t the same.

These days, everywhere I turn, I am reminded of the fact that I am not with family. No were more forcefully then at this morning’s church services

It has been a while since I have attended a family ward. As always, church is a pleasant experience when surrounded by little children. The Christmas program is beautiful. Kate’s mother is the choir director in this ward and the music is really amazing. Amber and I ooh’ed and ahh’ed over the children’s primary choir. But it is still off to sit through a family ward Christmas program and not recognize the faces of those around me.

In my mind I can see the ward back home. I can see Paul, James, and Luke sitting on the family pew. (We always sit on the right side of the chapel on the shorter benches. It was Mom and Dad’s way of dividing and conquering. They could sit next to each other and yet each kid was with in arms length. Therefore they could reach out and dispense justice any time it was needed. Lol!) Though, now that the boys are older and James and Paul play instruments they might have been tapped to help with the Christmas program….I’ll have to ask them. I can almost hear our choir back home…with the Wilkinsons, The Hepworths, Sister Clayton, Sister Lambert, and the priest quorum (for some reason, ever since I was a kid, all of our priests have been in the choir.)

I wonder what the Bishops remarks will be about. I know the gospel is the same all over the world. I know that the Music program is just as good here(especially with Kate’s Mom handling the program; she has really chosen some amazing pieces for the choir). But it feels different. It doesn’t feel like home.

Uh Oh….looks like it is time for the Bishop here to speak to us. I had better pay attention…….

TSO Live….....

Today we went to where ‘Virginia Meets the World’. The signs said so and so did Kate. Over a month ago my friend Patience suggested a show in Richmond. The Trans-Siberian Orchestra had 2 Saturday shows in our area for their tour. Of course I immediately thought of Kate and we agreed that we should attend with the group going. We didn’t think it through quite as much as we should have. We didn’t think about the traffic heading out of DC on the Saturday before Christmas. Whoops. In my opinion, the extra hour and a half was totally worth it.

We were scheduled to meet Angelee and Mark for dinner at 6. Upon arriving early we decided to walk around a cobblestone street that had this small bookstore (yes, it was my suggestion). Unfortunately, as we were leaving the parking garage I met the pavement up close and personal. Not one of my better moments but a common occurrence. Hopefully, the bruises won't show up for a bit. I don’t want my legs all banged up for church in the morning. Lol! At the bookstore, Kate came upon something she had never seen before. A book titled Naughty or Nice: Christmas Erotica. Who knew there exsisted such a book, apparently the staff at our book store, it was a ‘Staff Pick’. Lol! After killing time we headed to a German/Italian restaurant that our friend Mark had suggested called Acapella. The food and company was great. We even look happy. After 2 cherry cokes, 3 Tylenol and some good food, I almost didn’t feel the pain in my knee and ankle. Lol!

One of the worries that we all shared was dress code for this concert. We knew it was in a college arena, so we figured it would be a closer to a casual attire event and dressed accordingly. When we arrived we saw couples in all sorts of outfits. One lady was even wearing a formal opera cape but with the mix we didn’t stand out. Our seats were actually pretty great. Kate told me our tickets say we weren’t allowed to take pictures but the guards who searched my bag made no comments about my camera so I had fun. Most pictures were of us, I was trying to obey the rules but some of the laser shots were too good to miss. I will post them when I get them down loaded.

The concert was amazing!!! I loved it and more then once I felt bad that I didn’t think to invite my friend Perry the drummer. He would have loved the drum solo in the middle of the concert. It totally rocked.

I am going to close with Quotes from the evening:

K: If you are going to try German food, you should try it someplace like this.
R: What a German/Italian Restaurant?

A: If I can’t date a fun guy, I can’t eat a Fungi.
R: That doesn’t come out sounding like you want it to.
A: Alright then I can’t eat a fungi if I am not going to date a fun guy.
(It doesn’t look as funny as it sounds out loud. With the homonym it sounds deliciously dirty.)

R: I don’t usually consider myself a worldly person, and then I come to a place like this.

A: It's like Tchaikovsky with a twist.
R: Yeah, Tchaikovsky meets a 1980's hair band.

A: “For a minute there, it felt like we were at a rock concert.”
R: “Hon, we are at a rock concert.

K: License and Registration please. (Because of the bright lights)

P: I am beginning to feel as if we are being brainwashed

K: I’m walking in Memphis….

R: Next TSO concert, remember to bring the sunglasses.
M: And your sunscreen.
R: Can you get a sunburn from stage lights?

R: We're here, guess I should put my clothes on.

Saturday, December 22

Night Train to...........The District

It was one of those commutes home. As I walked down the escalator to the metro the thoughts came. I tried reading and listening to music but they wouldn’t be quiet. I found a small note book in my backpack and tried to get them on paper. But it was taking to long to write out by hand so when the train finally arrived, I did the unthinkable. I pulled out my laptop and let the thoughts loose. Thoughts tumbled out as my fingers flew over the keyboard, there was little order, just a need to get them into print. I put on headphones so as not to be bothered. I was worried that someone would ask a question and I would lose my train of thought. I am not sure it makes sense. As a matter of fact, after reading through it, it seems rather jumbled. But I didn't want to forget my thoughts from this evening so here is what came pouring out of my brain tonight:
Tonight I went to the movies with Kate to see P.S. I Love You. I know that when you attend a movie each audience member is supposed to find a way to connect with the movie. We are supposed to find a character that we can empathize and/or sympathize with. That is the point of movies. Tonight it was disturbing to see my fears and insecurities played out over and over again on the big screen. I wonder how many people feel the same way, I hope it wasn't just me.

Years ago my parents made choices that affected the lives of their children. Today I wondered what my life would have been like if they had made different choices. This is not something I usually dwell on. I know I can’t change it. It was not my choice to make and who knows if I would have made different ones were I in their shoes. I can only hope that I have learned from the choices that they have made.

I was 11 and a half when my parents choose to separate for the final time. I still remember the pain as we flew out of the airport in Riyadh. I think there were tears, but I don't remember it very clearly. I wrote about it in my journal. It wasn’t a pleasant entry, but one full of anger, fear, and pain. Shortly later, my mother chose to remarry. Again, it was not something in my control and I found myself in a situation that was out of my realm of experience. I have learned that the choices of the parents directly affect all of the children involved. There are 15 children that have been affected by the choices of my parents, for good or bad. As I have matured (Am I maturing or just getting older?) I have taken responsibility for my own choices and how they not only affect me but also those around me.

In tonight's movie, I saw a 30 year old woman break because she had put faith in marriage and it had failed yet again. At 14 she had known the pain of having her father leave their little family. Now 16 years later her husband had left her. Not by choice, by death. Noone was at fault, but it had happened all the same. She had put her trust in him being there forever only to find that he wouldn’t be there.

So I ask what if my parents hadn’t divorced….. ? What if my mother and step father hadn’t been so unhappy…? What if I hadn’t made the stupid choices I did at 19…..? Would I have more faith in the institution of marriage? Do you really think it would have changed things? Would I be one of those happy married people with homes and church callings and children and dogs (well not dogs I am allergic you know. Lol!)? I'll never really know but I think that even if my parents had made different choices my fears wouldn't have changed much. I am pretty sure I would still be the cynic I am today. I have made too many personal choices to cause said cynicism. I recognize my own lack of faith in men sticking around or marriages that are happy. Even by the time I was 11 I realized that most marriages weren’t a happy thing.

Somehow I have lost that original faith and trust in love and marriage. I do not have it and I don’t know how to restore it. I know there are things that I have no control over; even though I don’t want to believe it. I want to have control; to know that I will make the right choice. But no one can make those promises. No one can be assured that they will have the 60 years of marriage that they want, to have happiness for a lifetime. Even eternity is not a sure thing. So how do you put your faith in something so fallible? Where is there someone that would make me want to put faith in something like that? I have yet to meet him.

What I do know is that this is the life I am supposed to live. I know that the choices that have been made have given me empathy for those around me. Maybe the reason I have lived this life is to help me understand faith. To learn to have faith, not in the fallibility of those around me but in a Father who has a plan for me to return to Him. To have the faith to overcome the fear and find peace in the life that I have been given. Truly understand and accept that the Father knows best.

Maybe when I have learned these things fully, I will be prepared for a relationship. Maybe I will be ready to trust someone and allow them to be a part of my life. I am not ready yet, but I can always hope for the future. Until that time I will continue to find the joy and pleasure of my current status as a Singleton.
I would like to note that I am actually pretty happy being single. I just recognize that there could be something better if I could overcome my own fears.

Friday, December 21

Just for Sarah!

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
I guess my dad… The story goes like this: I was supposed to be a boy and they were going to name me Joseph Ray. Arizona Dad’s middle name is Ray, when I was a girl they decided that Rachel would work instead.

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
I can’t remember….But the next time will probably be when I see the movie P.S. I Love you with Kate tonight.

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
Sometimes…others I think it looks like a chicken scratch

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
Warm! I hate cold meat sandwiches

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?
Nope….maybe someday I will adopt a whole slew of 8-10yr olds. Kids are great at that
age. Lol!

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
I would sure hope so…

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT?
All the time.

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?
Yes, I don't remember having them removed.

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
I plan to…another some day

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
I don’t really eat cereal

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
No…it takes too long. Lol!

12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG?
Not really. I am a wuss…but I have a pretty good tolerance for pain. So I figure I am okay.

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
Mango…no wait....peach….no wait…strawberry…wait I don’t know…But I know it is a fruit flavor.

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
I am not sure; I don’t think I am very observant about people.

15. RED OR PINK?
Definitely Red….. pink is too girly

16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
I am 28 and usually to self absorbed to be social.

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
There are so many to choose from when I am living so far from my family and a lot of my friends. If I had to pick just one that would be Courtney. It has been 17 1/2 years since she died and I still wonder what she would say about the decisions I have made.

18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU?
I am blogging this for Sarah! So no one has to respond!


19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
Do you really care? I have blue jeans on and White blue and grey tennis shoes

20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
It is Friday we have doughnuts in the office…yum!

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
Sadly it is still Christmas in Kilarney. At least I know all of the right words now.

22. IF YOU WHERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
Turquoise

23. FAVORITE SMELLS?
a. Outside: Rain or shine, there is something about fresh air.
b. Books: whether it is the brand new book smell or from the used bookstore it doesn't matter.
c. Sarah had the best answer: Men’s aftershave…..Yum!

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
I was just manning the phones at the front desk…so it was someone I sent to voice mail. Personally, it was Kate Last night.

25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?
Heck yeah! Sarah is one of my favorite people, even if she does put me in a head lock sometimes. Lol!

26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?
I love going to watch baseball and Hockey…I don’t usually watch any sport on TV

27. HAIR COLOR?
It depends on what I am wearing and who you ask. The answer I give is usually strawberry dishwater blonde. Some people say it is red, some blonde, and a daring few even say brown. Who knows, surely not me.

28. EYE COLOR?
I think they are green now; they used to be blue when I was younger.

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
Nope….though I think glasses might be in my future again.

30. FAVORITE FOOD?
Ummm….Food. Other then cooked fish. I like it all!

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
Definitely Happy Endings where everything works out. I know it isn’t real, but if I wanted real I would watch the news!

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
Sadly Waitress…not one I suggest but my roommate rented it and loaned it to me.

33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
Again, why do you care? A green long sleeve with white work polo over it

34. SUMMER OR WINTER?
All of the above, but spring and fall are my favorites.

35. HUGS OR KISSES?
Depends on the situation….sometimes all I want to give is a handshake. Lol!

36. FAVORITE DESSERT?
Probably fruit flavored ice cream

37. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
Over the Edge by Suzanne Brockmann


38. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
I’m going commando – just my desk.

(Sorry Sar; I had to steal it. It made me laugh out loud…but only you and Meg would know how funny I think that is coming form you.)

39. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON T.V. LAST NIGHT?
The weather Channel, a couple of CSI’s, and some movie I don’t really remember. I was reading the latest post secret book

40. FAVORITE SOUND?
I am not sure…I love the sound of the ocean, or the quite of the library, or most music, or the sound of family.

43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?
It would have to be the Rolling Stones; I am not a Beatles fan.

41. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
On my own? FL and DC…Saudi was home when I was there. Lol!

42. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
Not that I can think of…I am fairly normal.

43. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?
Pocatello, ID

44. WHAT TIME IS IT NOW?
11:07 am DC time

Thursday, December 20

Christmas In Kilarney.....

On the topic of memories......

Here is the Christmas song that I remember most clearly from my oh so long ago youth. :P

A version of this song was played frequently. I wish I could find the right version, this one is slower then the one I know but it is all I could find. Hopefully you can enjoy it like I do. Just be grateful you are not in my office, I am singing along! Lol!

Wednesday, December 19

Finally FInished......

Who knew shopping was so much work? Oh wait...I did.

Finally all my gifts are purchased. Well almost all; I have to pick up one last gift card to finish off a gift. But other then that, all gifts have been purchased. There is still wrapping and delivering.....including the shipping of my mothers gift but that will be done on my lunch break tomorrow.

Hallelujah, I am done!

Tuesday, December 18

Because I couldn't resist......

You Are Ugly Underwear!

Comfortable and soft, more people like you than let on.
But it's very difficult for you to show yourself in public.

Memories........

I have a lot of time to think these days. It is almost as if I am watching my life as a movie:
The pale solitary figure staring out the windows of the train or bus; watching the dark streets pass with the occasional house decked out in Christmas lights. The young woman is given a wide berth by the strangers that surround her; not because she is ill or dangerous, but because she is different and aloof. Her reticence is sometimes taken as snobbishness, but in reality is nothing more then an innate shyness. The girl covers her discomfort by wearing headphones and holding a book in her lap. The strangers steal glances from the corners of their eyes; rarely looking at her directly and seeming a little flustered if she turns her gaze on them. What do they see in her eyes?
The time is usually used to think on the things I want to blog about. Unfortunately, I rarely have my computer on at that time therefore thoughts are never given substance. My thoughts are currently centered firmly in the past. It started with the re-emergence or Mr. Anonymous followed so closely by the Hinkson clan’s family reunion, Thanksgiving and now Christmas. How can you not think of the past when thinking about the holidays? There are traditions and memories that will never fade with time. Of course, my memory is fuzzy about so many of the little details that I need others to help me remember them. I want to remember them and so here are snippets of my past that I can’t seem to forget:
  • My daddy picking me up from school (he was hiding the fact that my friends were gathering for a surprise party at my house)
  • Courtney
  • Sitting on the stairs listening to my mother cry, the sense of dread that filled me as my small world was filled with death for the first time
  • Crying as we sat in the Airport in Riyadh
  • Gathering in the tiny apartment in Ohio with Grandma and Grandpa Hinkson for that first Hinkson family meeting
  • Staying with Aunt Jo in her apartment, foot rubs, needles, and spaghetti with sugar in it.
  • Derek Pino…..Lol! Enough said
  • The dreadful drive from Sundance to the Bishops house after the horrible scene in the parking lot….the fear and worry……
  • Spaghetti and Hot dogs...Sorry Patty…..that is a memory that won’t ever fade  Lol!
  • Chicken and Jo-Jos at Grandma and Grandpa Galloway’s house
  • Pulling curtain for my first show…'How to Succeed in Business'
  • Drew and I talking in the backyard
  • Waking up one morning to find that Adam had written something in the snow outside my window
  • That same Adam getting in an accident and calling me; which was followed by my mother relaxing the rules so that I could talk to him [I was grounded, yet again, but Mom always liked that Shelley boy :)]
  • Dances….. Tiana and I talked about these last night. Lol!
  • Apples and Caramel at the counter in the Thorne’s kitchen
  • Curled up on the floor of my closet reading
  • Days Inn
  • Nights with Shelley and the rest of the gang at Sears…learning to play Canasta, read Ranma ½, and getting to meet so many people; the good and the bad
  • Sarah putting me in a headlock
  • Meg at my kitchen table in tears
  • Mornings in the MTC Kitchen
  • 9/11 at the MTC and then later at the office where 2 of our guys were lost in NYC
  • Mama Bert in La Puenta……….
The list goes on and on. The present becomes the past and the future becomes the present. Some memories gratefully will never fade. Some, I continually pray will fade as time passes and some I scramble to get into writing so that as they are already fading I will have them to read about and try to remember.

My current mood could be caused by my current obsession with Colbie Caillat. For some reason I seem to be in the mood for listening to her CD in repeat.....Lol! Enjoy:

Monday, December 17

Wednesday, December 12

So many thoughts....

My mind is full. Time after time I have thought to try to capture them in a consistent pattern to post. Unfortunately, every time I sit to write, my thoughts scatter to the winds and I am stuck staring at a blank screen. Today I wanted to sit and write about what I have been thinking. I have been trying most of the afternoon and failing miserably.
It is the holiday season after all I should be writing something. But my thoughts have been rather maudlin lately. I know it has somewhat to do with my choice not to go home for the holidays. The only family Christmas I have missed was when I was a missionary and while I was sad then it was offset by the amazing experiences I was having. It’s not like I don’t have things to do. I have the ward Christmas parties (one last week and one this Friday) and the Work holiday party on Saturday. I am going to see the Trans Siberian Orchestra in Richmond on the 22nd. Kate has offered to let me have dinner with her family on Christmas Day. I have a visit to the White house on the 27th (trying to make up for the one that I missed earlier this year) I am going to see My Fair Lady after the first of the year. There is shopping to be done and gift giving and everything else. Yay! But there is no tree here, no decorations, no family traditions, and no family; which seems to make all the difference.

Thursday, December 6

In the snow....

There has been blog upon blog with pictures of people that were playing in the snow yesterday......So, not wanting to be left out, I am posting my favorite. This is what I saw as I was leaving work yesterday evening...
and No, the snow didn't let up until I was home. Lol!

I LOVE when it snows!

Wednesday, December 5

What do you google?

I often find myself chuckling over the phrases that people use to find my blog. Many a time I have looked at my statcounter and chuckled over the pages that they got stuck with. It seems daily that someone googles the phrase “the day everything went wrong” and finds that horrible day where I burned not only the enchiladas but also my hand. Lol!

Lately though, I have been fascinated by the occurrences of people searching the google images for the picture below. Lol! At least 2 or 3 times a day, around the world, someone finds this pic on my family’s blog from a random google search. Maybe I should be a little more worried…but in reality I am laughing.

Tuesday, December 4

Something new....

I learned at a young age that I am one of the many TVidiots (a family term) of my generation. I have a hard time turning off the tv. I have a hard time focusing on anything if the tv is playing. What does that have to do with now? Well when I moved in to my new apartment last month my new roommate informed me that there was a tv already being used for our family room. I placed mine in my room. Not really a big deal. We have satellite and I hadn't received my receiver box. Until last night, I had only watched a couple of movies. No big deal.
Unfortunately, last night the receiver box arrived. After a small battle with requiring a screwdriver and some elbow grease, I now have TV in my bedroom. Yes, concentration is difficult. But the show Life last night made me laugh! Then I made a cool discovery.
This morning while searching for the weather channel I came across Channel 374.
I have BYU TV!I know, I'm a geek. But I'm really excited about that. I can watch all of the devotionals and everything. Lol!
I feel like my mother.
Tee Hee Hee.....

Sunday, December 2

36 hours later.....

I have finished The Twilight Collection; all 1, 690 pages. I can now say that I understand the obsession. Pardon the spoilers, if you don’t want to hear it then you are done reading for now. Lol! At least you know what I did for my weekend. Lol!

Everyone I have spoken to is in love with Edward. I can understand the pull and by the end of book one I was in complete agreement with my cousin’s statement of wanting her own Edward. But as I progressed through book two and book three I came to disagree. I think I would prefer my own Jacob. Lol! I am probably the only one that finds this extremely ironic. Let me explain.

I noticed while reading these books that the author liked to incorporate the classic works of fiction; Romeo and Juliet, Wuthering Heights (which I now want to read) etc. As I read New Moon and Eclipse I kept seeing the role of Colonel Brandon being played by the young Jacob. At first this frustrated me. Anyone who knows the story of Sense and Sensibility realizes that Maryanne ends up with good Colonel Brandon. He is the man that is best for her, the one who loves her the most. I have always hated that story for just that reason. I never cared what Brandon felt. I thought that Maryanne settled for less then she deserved. She deserved a Willoughby that was a good man but she settled for the lackluster relationship to be had with Brandon instead of waiting for something better. Not that Willoughby would have gotten any better, but maybe, just maybe, there would have been something like that available with someone else at another time. I thought she was a coward and took the safe option.

But time and again, as I read these books, my sympathies went to Jacob. Edward was the handsome Willoughby. He swooped in with his looks and talents and advantages and there love blossomed. This time though, Willoughby was deserving of the fair Maryanne; he was a good man. He deserved her affection and the sacrifices he made were for her. So this time she didn’t have to settle. But would it really have been settling? The love was there, just as strong, if not more powerful. Jacob was the steady comfort that would never leave. He watched over Bella as she struggled to come back from the edge of despair; helping as much as he was able. Of course there were the mistakes of the young and foolish, but nothing that was unforgivable. He would have been perfect for Bella, fulfilling all of her mortal dreams. But her dreams were no longer of the mortal kind. While, her choice is not one I would have made (I think I prefer Fire to Ice), I can understand and realize that Jacob deserves more then second place. I am aching to read book 4 when it comes out, in hopes that he finds first place with another.

Back to my original thought, somehow I have come 180 degrees from my original view of dear Colonel Brandon. I seem to be sympathizing with the Colonel. *GASP* Maybe my perspective has changed over the years. Maybe I realized that I no longer dream of a Willoughby to come in and sweep me off my feet. I can stand on my own two feet just fine. Maybe I now hope for days when I can enjoy the constant steady love that is borne of trust and friendship. The consistent kind of love that will keep me from the edge of insanity that seems to permeate my life.

Thursday, November 29

AJ or Churchill???


Recently a co-worker of mine mentioned that she is not all that fascinated with the new babies....she thinks they all look like Winston Churchill in diapers.



As I mentioned a few days ago, I am the proud new Auntie of Abraham Jay Palmer. And while I think he is completely adorable I can't quite decide if he has the Churchill face...
You be the judge. Lol!

Be very proud of me......

When I arrived home last night I found a box outside my bedroom door. I was giddy as a school girl with her first crush when I ripped it open. They have arrived. I could hardly believe it. The books now sit on my shelf...I have the whole collection as it currently stands. In HARDCOVER! I know, I am as shocked as you are. I don't buy hard cover, but who knows when the paperback version would come out for book 2 and 3? I couldn't wait and so to be uniform I to get the first in hard cover too. Lol! It took every ounce of discipline to put off starting on them. I knew if I started I would be up all night reading and I needed to be coherent for work today. So now I sit trying to concentrate while craving an Edward fix....Tomorrow....I will start them tomorrow night.

For now the anticipation of a whole weekend curled up in my books will have to suffice.

***for those that don't recognize the picture, I am referring to the Twilight Collection by Stephanie Meyer. I am now the proud owner of Twilight, New Moon, and Eclipse. I am not sure how I will survive until book 4 comes out next Fall. ***

Tuesday, November 27

To Tide you over

I didn't get home until after 10 last night so the blog didn't get edited. To tide you over I found a fun quiz to share.

Also a huge shout out to my baby sister and her hubby who just had their first baby boy last night. Congrats.....Now all he needs is a name. Lol!





You're Ulysses!

by James Joyce

Most people are convinced that you don't make any sense, but compared to what else you could say, what you're saying now makes tons of sense. What people do understand about you is your vulgarity, which has convinced people that you are at once brilliant and repugnant. Meanwhile you are content to wander around aimlessly, taking in the sights and sounds of the city. What you see is vast, almost limitless, and brings you additional fame. When no one is looking, you dream of being a Greek folk hero.


Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

Monday, November 26

On Hold....

Well I wrote a very long post about my holiday while I was at the airport yesterday....but I don't really like it....so you will have to wait until I have time to fix it.

Until then.....

To all those that suggested Twilight:
I read it on the plane and finished it before I went to bed. I loved it and can't wait to buy the next 2 books.

To Mr Anonymous:
You haven't been forgotten, as a matter of fact, you were even talked about at the family reunion. Lol! I just have to make time to respond.

To the rest of You:
I hope you had a great holiday and I will post more when I surface from the work that has piled up in my absence.

Sunday, November 25

The Thanksgiving re-cap

Exhaustion has settled over my brain. If this entry doesn’t make any sense I apologize. I am on day 3 or 4 of less then 2 hours of sleep and I am not sure I can even form complete sentences at this point. Unfortunately, my flight doesn’t board for another hour and a half, so I have to stay awake at least until that point. Fortunately, I have found the one and only vending machine in the airport that offers Cherry Coke. I might actually make it to take off before crashing. Lol!

It has been quite a week for me. As I blogged on Tuesday, I arrived in Utah on Monday night. After waiting impatiently all day for my credit card, I was finally able to do the things that I had planned for this stop in Utah. I got to see baby Sean Michael, who is really no longer a baby. I went shopping with Tallie for baby things. I went to dinner with Sarah, Meg, John, William, and Leah (Meg has the cutest kids). I went to a movie with Sarah and Meg for a girl’s night out. We had so much fun and The Rock…YUM! Then I rounded out the evening playing games with Wog, Cricket, and Goose until the wee hours of the morning. Wednesday was more playing with the boys and then packing the car and we were off to California. It was just four of us making the 10 hour trek across Utah and Nevada for the Hinkson family reunion. Goose, Cricket, Dad, and I set up shop in Mom and Dad’s Mercedes and traveled in style. Dad let me drive for a few hours on Wednesday night and I must say it is quite a sweet ride. Lol!

Thursday, started bright and early with the annual turkey bowl. Apparently, the guys in my Uncle Greg’s ward have been playing football every Thanksgiving morning for the last 21 years. Since we were all there, our family was invited and even those of us that didn’t want to play tagged along to watch. I spent most of the time, getting in good quality play time with my nieces, Sammy, Nannah, Amber, and my nephew baby Kent. I don’t see them all that often so no one begrudged me my role as favorite Aunt for a day. I have some of the cutest nieces and nephews, though you will have to see the family link for pictures. After football, we cleaned up to head to the church for Thanksgiving Dinner Lunch really, but we ate all day so who could really tell. Lol! There were 42 people at dinner. Yes, we are all related, even more shocking….we counted and there are at least 21 of us who didn’t make it. Can you imagine what it would look like if all of us gathered? Sheesh! Dinner was followed by volleyball and then Pie at Grandma’s. Quite a small house for 42 people, but the conversations were fun and the kids had a blast with each other.

Black Friday, was a lazy day for me, I didn’t get up until almost 7 am and then was fed Swedish Pancakes. Yum! The whole clan headed to the beach (COLD!) for games and a bonfire. It was a first for my sister-in-law Cyn and she had a ball with her camera. There was quite a wind that killed any chance of Frisbee or volley ball, but Sandcastle making and roasting hotdogs and smores over an open flame was definitely fun. When the wind got to be too much we headed back to the church for more volleyball and National Treasure on a projection screen.

Saturday started with the family pictures. Every donned their matching family reunion shirts and drove to a nearby park for pictures with Grandma and Grandpa. I must say we took quite a few. Since we were missing over half of our family we chose not to get a personal family picture. Lol! 6 hours later, after lunch at In and Out Burger and a dinner of pizza our group was back on the road to Utah. This time I sat in the back with Goose to watch Around the World in 80 Days and Happy Feet. Then it was time to change and I finished the drive home. I found that the Mercedes can go 0 to 50 in about 5 seconds, and can do 100 mph with out breaking stride. Lol! As I said, it is a sweet ride. Lol!

So to reiterate what I said at the beginning, I am now running on 2 hours of sleep for the 3rd or 4th day in a row. I am now going to start Twilight, which has been suggested for too many days. I caved and bought it. Let’s see if it is enough to keep me up until take off.

Tuesday, November 20

And I was all by myself….no one was looking…..all by myself……

So this morning the silence was ok. I got ready, did some scripture study, checked some email, wrote the blog below. You know standard stuff. But as morning drags into afternoon with no sign of the FedEx man, I am getting bored. Mom and Tallie have been in and out. The boys will start coming home from school in a few hours, but until Mr FedEx comes I am stuck at home with no company other then my dad sleeping upstairs.

Now back to the regularly scheduled blog…


Home again?


No matter how much you wish things to stay the same, they never do. Here I sit in my parent’s family room. The furniture is familiar. The pictures on the walls are the same. But things are different. The people here are no longer the same. Pauliwog, is a priest, he is driving now. Even worse, he is taller then me, by several inches. Jamers voice has lowered by so many octaves it scares me AND he is the exact same height as I am. Sacrilege! I have told Goose that he is no longer allowed to grow any more. I soon am going to feel like the woman from Mary Poppins. You know the one whose daughters grew and grew and grew. They these boys are going soon I will be considered a midget next to them. Lol!

I slept in this morning as the kids had their last day of school, so after I had gotten ready for the day, I took a walk through the rooms that used to be so familiar to me. Mom has continued in her need to rearrange things every few months. The boys have changed rooms since my visit in July. There are books all over the room that Jamesers and Wog share, along with sheet music (Wog plays the french horn and Jamesers the violin). Goose now has balls of all sorts in his room; soccer balls, basketballs, and kickballs fill his closet. All these are things I didn’t have anything to do with.

It is odd, this feeling of being a visitor. Not a bad feeling, I have changed just as much, but the odd feeling doesn’t sit as well as I thought it would.

Mr. Anonymous: I am still pondering your comments, and have no clue who you or your mysterious gym rat are.....

Saturday, November 17

I'm teleporting, I'm teleporting!!!

I know there is only one person in the world that will understand this but the joke was to good to ever forget.....

So in honor of Tiana, I send this out to the blog world knowing that I will forever giggle at the thought of yelling "I'm teleporting, I'm teleporting!!!" at the most inopportune moments.

A Challenge....

***Warning: I am beyond tired...read at your own risk.***

The train car is crowded. People have spent the evening out on the town and now the car has the lingering scent of alcohol. I sit alone on my bench. My headset is playing the classics of the 70’s and a book is in my hand. Unfortunately, none of this does me any good as I cannot focus. I am distracted by the indescribable emotion that has settled lately; an emotion that neither my latest thriller nor Dilbert can seem to break through.

Yesterday, the traffic on my blog doubled due to the comment left by anonymous. The girl mafia, of course, read the new comment and the old comments and I have been given quite a bit of advice on the situation. Steph says I should just ignore it therefore teaching Mr. Anonymous that he shouldn’t play the anonymous card. Meg and Sarah have cautioned me to be careful; you never know what type of people you will find on the internet after all. Jer went over our connected past, trying to help me find a link somewhere. (He did give me a possibility, but who knows if the clue is helpful). Ben, while not a member of the girl mafia was the most adamant about his opinion, lol! He says I should tell Mr. Anonymous to “put up or shut up”. He comments go hand in hand with those from Meg using the phrase “mystery schmystery.” Personally, my curiosity is still peaked.

As with the first posting by Mr. Anonymous, the door to the memories of my past has cracked open and the flood of memories will not be stopped. Spending an evening dancing with Drew in my backyard with one objective…who knew it would take hours to get a boy to kiss me. Sheesh! The drama of my high school years, sick family, fights with Drew, trips to Florida, dances, lunches, swing sets, trees that were climbed. The night I spent talking with Adam; literally talking until dawn. The morning I took the ill-fated trip to Sqaw Peak with ‘he who shall forever remain nameless’. There are a parade of faces, some which I can place with a name to and some I cannot, from school, work, church, and other random places. Ahhhhh…the follies of youth, especially the thinking that it would always be so easy.

The cynical side of me tells me that the man that you see almost every morning is NOT someone that I would be happy to run into. There are only 3 men in my past that I never want to see again. (I figure after 28 yrs 3 major regrets isn’t so bad, right?) Every one of them was “charming” AND I really don’t want to hear that any of them look "good" at this point. I would prefer that they are going bald with a fat paunch, thank you very much. Lol! I figure I am no more then a speed bump in their histories.

The curious side says to find out more. I really, really want to know who you are and who you see….

The third side is the most cynical. It tells me that this is all a fake story created to show my naiveté. It wouldn’t be the first time that I was taken in by the slick story of a stranger, believing that he was being honest with me.

Yet as I have remembered all of these things, the highs and lows of all of my relationships/friendships/school-girl crushes, one emotion has lain like a light film over all of the others: Fear.

As one who tries never to give into fear but to face it instead, I choose to take Ben’s advice: Who are you? And where do I know you from?

I’ll expect an answer in another 10 months when you get back to my blog. Lol!

Friday, November 16

I don't want to write what is in my head so you get stuck with this:

Yesterdays comments sparked quite a bit of conversation today. I am not quite sure what I want to write about it. I will write later but not tonight. I didn't get home until late and I am tired. So to tied you over I give you the men of regency. While playing around in my you tube account earlier today I found this one that Boo had sent me. I forgot how much I liked it. Lol! Enjoy while I ponder things in my melancholy mood.

Monday, November 12

Out of Africa

While browsing through movies on Blockbuster.com I came across this one and figured that I should watch it to remember what was so great about it. Many years ago, when I was small (can you see me stroking my chin with a wise expression on my face? Lol!) I remember my mother telling me that Out of Africa was one of her favorite movies. I don’t remember watching the movie back then, but I am sure I must have at least once.
It arrived from Blockbuster weeks ago and has been sitting on my shelf waiting patiently to be watched. Tonight, since I am in my room unpacking anyway, I thought it would be as good a time as any.
Karen, the character portrayed by Meryl Streep is reminiscent of her character in Bridges of Madison County. They are both women who are under appreciated, who want to live life to the fullest and know that they will never get another chance. So they take what is offered and the love that goes with it. Unfortunately, the love that is offered is not from the one to which each of those characters is married. Does that make it any less painful to watch them end up apart at the end of the show? Your heart aches for the lost chance. Though, the words of Karen resound in my mind this evening. “I want to be worth something.” When faced with the choice to be alone or to spend her life with someone that was always flying off into the sunset, she chose to be alone.

I want to be worth something. I want to be important enough to someone. I want to be apart of something…..What woman doesn’t?

And that is the end of my melancholy evening I thing I will follow up with something funny and happy before I turn in.

Good night all!

Independence…

I have always thought myself to be a fairly independent person. I pride myself on being able to get around on my own and not have to lean on many people. I hate to be a bother. If people want to help then they can offer, otherwise, I know that they have busy lives and I don’t take offense at them not wanting to assist. While talking with Kate this weekend, I commented on how some of my friends and my boss, worry about me when I move. I asked why this was as I have always been able to take care of myself. Kate’s response was to laugh and say “Aug 2006”.

For those that don’t know, that was a bad month for me. Between headaches, fatigue, and dizzy spells, I don’t remember a lot. Kate reminded me of at least one incident where a roommate had to help me up off of the floor of the bathroom…though I am not sure why I was on the floor in the first place. Lol! That is a bad sign. Now that is a thing of the past. While I still get tired, it is nothing like it was that year, thank heavens. Kate and I had a good chuckle over the memories and that was the end of the conversation.

Over the last 3 days, I keep coming back to that conversation. I have come to the realization that while I THINK I am completely independent that is far from the truth. In my last blog, I mentioned that I got lost while trying to find my home. Not once or twice but 3 times! Well this morning I did it again. Trying to get to work I missed a turn somewhere and ended up driving all over DC. I hate to be lost so I first called Gina and she helped me, only to have me take the wrong entrance to get on the freeway. Afterwards there was a lengthy call to Steph, who struggled to figure out where I was while she was in Dallas, TX. Finally it was figured out and I was on my way…the long way around the beltway. So add getting lost and the long way around the beltway to my morning commute and you have added an extra hour to that commute. Lol! All I could think when I dropped off the rental car was: Please, just leave me to my metro. I am comfortable there, and oh so happy!

So how does all of this go together….Well, it is unsettling to find that I am not as independent as I want to be. Whether I am ill or just trying to find my way around, I can’t do it all on my own. Or should I say, I can’t do it all on my own YET! I’ll get there. Just you wait.

Sunday, November 11

The Day Dawn is Breaking the world is awaking……

I have finally moved. I will email out the new address to those who need it, don’t stress.

Yesterday was a test of my endurance. After a week of little sleep and a lot of work and packing I was up bright and early (Gina arrived at 6:50 am) to start the process of moving all of my accumulated junk. Boy, do I have a lot of it. Looking back I wish I had my camera, but I never had the time to stop and take the pictures. Ben was kind enough to show up and load up the truck with all of the heavy things. He even loaded my dresser all by himself! I am no light weight and can usually handle moving heavy furniture, but not all by myself. That dresser is heavy and awkward. I am still impressed if you can’t tell. Lol! Kevin and Lael showed up and we finally got into a rhythm. In no time we had the truck, Gina’s car, and Lael’s station wagon loaded and ready to go. Amazingly enough that only left a small load for me to come back for.

Ben had to head home and so there were four of us that descended upon my new house. In a little over an hour we had all of the vehicles unloaded and the contents in my room. Gina and I headed back to the house to load up the last load ourselves before doing a final walk through. While there, we decided that we should order lunch from our favorite place. Wing Zone, I miss it already. The last walk through was hard. It was sad to see things so empty; there are so many memories there. I think, as antsy as I got, I wasn’t really looking to leave.

By the time Gina and I went our separate ways we were already very tired. I own a lot of heavy books and hauling those from place to place it quite a work out. So by the time I headed to Tyson’s to pick up my forgotten check book, I was ready to weep with exhaustion. Kate called and offered to help me unpack some. So I swung by her place to pick her up before heading back into the district. What followed was something I never want to repeat. Now, Gina, Lael and I had gotten lost on our first trip to my new house, but it was nothing like what Kate and I went through. All I can say is that I am very grateful that I rely on the metro system and don’t have to figure out these streets. We spent 2 hours going in circles, trying to find my house. Kate was actually pretty patient as I got more and more frustrated and my headache got worse and worse. After finally finding my house we quickly unloaded the last of the items and I had time enough to take Kate home.

When I dropped Kate off and headed home on my own I was very aware that I have a horrible sense of direction. It didn’t seem to matter how careful I was as yet again I got lost (this time ending up out by Bolling Air Force Base). I was tired, my head hurt, and I had no clue where I was. I called Gina and finally got myself home with only a 30 minute detour. I think the funniest part was that I didn’t see a cop to help me out until I knew where I was. He finally stopped to talk to me when I parked in front of my house. Lol! I think he was worried because I was circling my block. Lol! But by the time I recognized where I was I had passed my house, AGAIN! Lol!

I unpacked until a little after 10 when the exhaustion got to be too much. After a shower, which took longer then I expected do to the effort it took to move, I crawled into my bed around 11:30. And there I stayed until 1:30 this afternoon; not even the sunrise coming through my blind-less windows could break through the fatigue that plagued me. I’ll have to hit the new ward next Sunday.

The downside to this move, other then getting lost 3 times in one day: I lost my debit card. I last remember using it Friday night to buy the doughnuts needed for Monday morning. But the call to the doughnut shop was too frustrating for words, as the weekend employees only speak Spanish!! Now I have to figure out how to fill the tank of a truck with out my debit card. Kate kindly helped me out yesterday by filling it half full. But I used that half a tank getting lost. UGH! The frustrations never seem to end.

Anyway, I am slowly unpacking what I own. As I was unpacking my clothes, I decided that there are things I should be getting rid of. I didn’t have time to purge my belongings when I was packing, so if I haven’t worn or used it in the last year and a half to 2 years, I am getting rid of it. I already have a large box of clothes that I am getting rid of. Lol! There are just so many things I don’t need. And why haul around what you don’t need it you don’t have too. On that note, I am going to lay down some more before unpacking. The headache still hasn’t gone away and I am hoping some more shut eye will help.

Happy Sunday to y’all!!

Monday, November 5

Disjointed Thoughts on a Monday Morning…

It feels as if I haven’t written in forever. Most days I am tired and stressed. It makes me kind of grumpy so I try to steer clear of people unless I am at work where that is not a possibility.

  • I can’t believe that Kristin has been in the hospital for a month. It seems like just yesterday we were carpooling to work together. The time has gone by in a blur. Work is crazy busy, giving me no real time to think. Once I am home there are other things to stress about. Lol!

  • I move this weekend. I have rented a pickup truck and I figure I can do most of it myself. My only worry is moving the furniture. Even I can’t move a dresser by myself. Lol! I’ll have to figure out how I want to handle that; hopefully before Saturday.

  • Being me, I of course packed my books first. My friend Ben, introduced me to LibraryThing a month or two ago. I figured now would be a good time to catalog my books, so as I packed them away I entered the ISBN numbers into LibraryThing. Quite a feat, especially when I realized that I have almost a thousand books in my house. Actually,I topped out at 994 but there were a couple of books from the White House Historical Association and a couple of church books that didn’t come up in the database. Plus I believe I still have one or two boxes of books back home in Utah. I guess I am really on my way to having my own library. Lol!

  • I have decided to give away my love seat. Mostly because everyone hates it and it isn’t all that comfortable. *Sigh* it was my first furniture purchase. It is hard to get rid of it. It cost me 5 bucks 2 years ago….maybe it was 10; I’m not sure. Lol! So I have decided to give it away. Freecycle here it comes. (Okay, my real reason for getting rid of it….that thing is one heavy sucker and I really, really, don’t want to move it again. My arms are already sore from moving my books this weekend. Lol!)

Now I have to work, I have an interview in an hour and a list of a million things to do….*sigh*

Monday, October 29

Because I don't want to be working right now...

you are lightskyblue
#87CEFA

Your dominant hues are cyan and blue. You like people and enjoy making friends. You're conservative and like to make sure things make sense before you step into them, especially in relationships. You are curious but respected for your opinions by people who you sometimes wouldn't even suspect.

Your saturation level is lower than average - You don't stress out over things and don't understand people who do. Finishing projects may sometimes be a challenge, but you schedule time as you see fit and the important things all happen in the end, even if not everyone sees your grand master plan.

Your outlook on life is bright. You see good things in situations where others may not be able to, and it frustrates you to see them get down on everything.
the spacefem.com html color quiz

Sunday, October 28

It is Interesting to note....

that while I like to move a lot, I do not like uninvited change. I know I was antsy and raring to go somewhere, but now reality has set in. My landlord sold the house we have been living in. This is great and what we all hoped for him. But I have liked my life this last year. I love my house. I am going to have to move out of it now and that saddens me just a bit. I knew it was coming, but the actuality is still a source of an odd sort of melancholy. Well, as with every other change that has come my way uninvited, I will get over it.

Wednesday, October 24

Not what I was expecting....

I had to blog because I thought this was funny, though my roommates think I am a little crazy.

Last night when I got home I was surprised to find an extra envelope from Blockbuster. As I was expecting he Rogers and Hammerstein’s version of State Fair, I figured they had sent me the same movie twice. Not even close. While, I did receive a copy of State Fair the second envelope contained a move about a black woman trying to rescue her brother from the mob. The description included the sentence “Predictably, she must pose as a prostitute, as well as engaging in…”. I’ll let you ponder over what the rest of the description said. Lol! Something tells me that if I were to watch it I wouldn’t find a girl in a gingham dress singing "It Might as W ell Be Spring”. Lol! The most hilarious thing is the picture in my mind of one of my roommates opening it and watching it, expecting State Fair. Lol! It makes me laugh until I cry. Seriously, that's just funny,

Now I have to get to work. Hope y’all have a great Wednesday!

Tuesday, October 23

Today I am going to write....

9:35 am
I know; I have been a horrible blogger as of late. Things are just so crazy busy. But I am going to take the time this morning and write. I can take a few minutes....

10:54 am
The thought was there. I was going to write. Instead there have been 2 phone calls, 3 employees in my office, a bunch of emails, 1 mistake on my part that has to be corrected, and the planning of a visit to my boss for lunch. So here it is an hour later and….

3:18 pm
Well I have kept this document open all day in hope of actually writing a blog. But I just haven’t really had the time. I keep telling myself to take the time. But I there hasn’t been time to take. On a good note, I had lunch with my boss. She is still in the hospital on bed rest, and bored out of her mind. Today she got her lap top, she is kind of excited. Lol! Hopefully that can stave off some of the boredom……

4:45 pm
Lol! Life here never changes; there is always another thing to add to my list of things to do. For the first time in my “career” I am actually using my Outlook calendar for more then other people’s appointments. Now I have to keep track of things somewhere. When I need to discuss this and when I have to speak to so and so, there is a never ending list of things to do....

6:30 pm
So I am finally done for the day. There is more that I could do, but I figure today has been long enough. If I leave now, with the metro ride I will be home by 8pm. I think maybe I will watch some tv….or maybe I will just read. Or maybe I will just give up and sleep. I should read some of my emails. I started collecting them during the week and reading emails on the weekend. Unless it is from a roommate on housing I usually don't even open it. Even my emails from my family are on hold. Lol! Some day I am going to be able to breathe again. Unfortunately I think that will be in February.

As a side note: The roommates went to go see another house tonight. Hopefully it was a good one. I would really like to lock down a new place before I have to move out. Lol!

Friday, October 12

Too Tired to come up with a real title.....

So people have commented on my lack of posting this last week. Sorry about that. Life has gotten quite busy. My boss went into pre-term labor last week and is now on bed rest for the next month. She can’t even leave the hospital. So I got real busy real fast. Lol! Tonight I didn’t get home until about 8:45 pm, though most nights I am home around 8. It has been dark when I left the office. Lol! And it looks like it will continue to be this busy for the foreseeable future. I am not really complaining; I like the challenge. I love to be busy and to end my day feeling like I have accomplished something. Although, after a week the only thought I have is that I am tired….I am really tired. So I skipped the movie tonight, passed on the offer of bowling and came straight home. I spent the last hour going over emails and now I am going to read for the next little bit and then crash. Maybe I will get lucky and it will quash this headache that has taken up residence behind my eyes for the last two days.

That is my life in a nutshell these days. Other then surfing Craigslist to find a new house, I am at work or asleep. Lol! To boring to even write about.

Saturday, October 6

"That's all I have to say about that...."

Today was the Saturday session of General Conference. There were many things said that touched my heart, most of it to personal to write here So...instead I'll share the poem Pres. Thomas S. Monson quoted.

Crossing The Bar
by Alfred Lord Tennyson


Sunset and evening star,
And one clear call for me!
And may there be no moaning of the bar,
When I put out to sea,

But such a tide as moving seems asleep,
Too full for sound and foam,
When that which drew from out the boundless deep
Turns again home.

Twilight and evening bell,
And after that the dark!
And may there be no sadness of farewell,
When I embark;

For though from out our bourne of Time and Place
The flood may bear me far,
I hope to see my Pilot face to face
When I have crossed the bar.

Sunday, September 30

Home....

Tonight I am sitting in my room. I can hear the crickets through the open window behind me. The cool air that comes into the room carries the scent of fall. Can you believe the time has passed so fast? Another summer has ended. Tonight I sit listening to country music on the radio. Songs about loss and love and how they’re “gonna be somebody”. It’s nice. How many times have I sat here like this? It has become a habit. My book, my radio, my window……..My home. It seems as if I have lived here forever. Yet.....

My time here at this house is coming to a close. By the end of Oct. we will know the closing date of our lease with our landlord. I might be moving as soon at Nov. 30th or as late as Jan 11th. What seemed light years away back in January has snuck up on me. Tonight I sit here and wander what it would be like not to have to move again. To know that the lease would continue indefinately and the moving would end. With all of the wanderlust that fills my veins, there are moments when I wish for the comfort of the familiar. I know that when it comes time to move I will be excited about the chance to go to someplace new. Regardless of where I go I love the thrill of the move. There are new people, new places, new things, new decorating, new opportunities; it’s all new. Maybe someday the desire for permanence will be stronger then this strange transient feeling. I even hope that someday I will have something that will tie me to a place. For now, I am grateful for the opportunities each new place has afforded me. And when these rare moments of longing happen, well.....as the scriptures say "it came to pass."

Thursday, September 27

Another year down......

2 years, 321 posts, 1,953 First Time Visitors *, 4,778 Total Visitors *, and 6,391 Pageloads * later I am still here.

I know. Shocking!

Who know that many people had nothing better to do with their time then read the random thoughts that pour out of my abused brain? This blog started as a place for me to write; one that no one would read, a journal of sorts. Or at least that is what I told myself. In reality, I think my inner exhibitionist was battling with my innate shyness. I really wanted to have people know what I was thinking with out having to say it out loud. Lol!

A lot has gone on in those 2 years: New friends, new family members, new housing, and various adventures. It amazes me some of the things I have written. That shy part of me cringes as I read my personal thoughts and feelings on display for the world to google. I worry every time I find that someone has googled my name and come to my blog. What will they think, why are they looking for me or the Place of Rae. Though I laugh too…I mean come on, I repeat: Why are they looking for me or the Place of Rae. I am not someone important and what I write is not all that earth shattering. It makes me chuckle to think that some out there wants to read what I have written. Lol!

Nevertheless, 2 years have gone by. What started as a personal place to “spew forth my thoughts” has become a timeline of my activities; one that can help me to remember these times in my life. Because these times need to be remembered; they are some pretty good times. So here is to 2 more years…or 20 or how many ever more I get!


* Numbers based on StatCounter installed Feb '06.

Wednesday, September 26

Oh the Places You'll Go......

This blog might be part of the itchy feet problem. I came across it some how about a month ago and have been lurking ever since. Many of you might not think it would be cool to RV around the US. But for those of us that have a hard time settling in one place this seems like a perfect idea. I love seeing the places they go and the things they see. This last week or so they have been to the home town of Samuel Clemens, Hannibal Missouri, Independence, Missouri and Coffeeville, Kansas. They are currently somewhere in Oklahoma. Lol! Hmmm.......the people you get to meet when you travel through those towns in the middle of the US. You never know what you'll find.
Lol!
Maybe someday I can travel like them. For now, I will enjoy the comforts of a home that isn’t on wheels and live vicariously through The Mighty Quinns. Lol!

Tuesday, September 25

The Pitter Patter of Little Feet

They Keep Coming.....














Congrats go out to the newest expectant mothers in the Gifford / Hinkson Clan!




My big brother and his wife are expecting baby #2 in March.


AND (!)

The New Mr and Mrs. James Fraze will have a new little one joining their family next May!!!




That brings the Grandkid total to 9! Whew! Mom is finally getting her wish. Lol!

HEROES!!!

Wahoo! It's back and it started with a bang. I am Soooooo excited!

Monday, September 24

Itchy feet....

It is happening again. That urge to move. It happens every so often. But lately, it has gotten to be a pretty strong pull. My lease is up shortly so I can do it. But where to go? And when? I am locked into my current employment situation for the next couple of months. I gave my word that I would be here, and so I will. But what about after that?

I miss real snow...maybe I should move to the North East...it gets cold in Maine. Or how about Alaska, there is definitely snow there. I don't have my degree but I definitely have experience, so maybe it would be worth something. Maybe New York, I have always wanted to go there. Steph suggested Montana...But that would require me buying a car. Which I could probably do...maybe.

Any suggestions?

Thursday, September 20

A Day of Rest: Day 2

There is something about waking up to the sounds of birds chirping that relaxes. Maybe it is my unconscious desire to be Cinderella? What do you think?
I currently sit in my bed underneath my open window. The sky is blue, the air is crisp, the birds are chirping, and every so often I can here the trains for the metro. I have the radio playing to add a little noise; I can’t believe how silent the house is at 9 am on a weekday.
Today is the second day off that I am taking. No reason really, though I get the opportunity to tour the White House today. I am kind of excited and I will be leaving once my clothes are done in the dryer. These days off are more pleasant then I expected. They remind me of those coveted Christmas vacation days years ago in high school. You know the kind I am talking about..... You wake up early because you are in the habit, but there is no reason to get up so you just lie there listening to the world come alive. Once others are up and about you get up and chat while they go about whatever they are doing.

I think this is the best vacation I could have taken, usually when I take time off there is a rigid schedule of things that I want to do. Just last week I planned my day off starting at 9 am and not coming home until 9 pm. But today, I only have the WH tour planned, and that is not until later today so I can just relax this morning. Some good country music and a good book…..*sigh* perfection.

Hope you are having a great day!

Tuesday, September 18

More Sad news...

Years ago, I worked a night shift for Sears Home Central. While there I met Eric, an extremely shy man with a love for RPG's and Anime, your basic geek. Eric, knowing of my love for books introduced me to many things, including Ranma 1/2, which still makes me laugh all these years later. More importantly, Eric introduced me to the World or Robert Jordan. The Wheel of Time Series quickly became a favorite of mine, as a matter of fact I own the entire collection (and just purchased the same for my roommate. Happy Birthday Kim.).

So it was quite a shock to learn that Robert Jordan passed away on Sunday (9/16/07). I didn't even know he was ill. My thoughts and prayers go out to his family and close friends.

As reported in the Associated Press:

Robert Jordan

CHARLESTON, S.C. (AP) — Author Robert Jordan, whose "Wheel of Time" series of fantasy novels sold millions of copies, died of a rare blood disease. He was 58.

Jordan, whose real name was James Oliver Rigney Jr., was born and lived in this southern city most of his life.

He died Sunday at the Medical University of South Carolina in Charleston of complications from primary amyloidosis with cardiomyopathy, his personal assistant, Maria Simons, said Monday.

The blood disease caused the walls of Rigney's heart to thicken.

He wrote a trilogy of historical novels set in Charleston under the pen name Reagan O'Neal in the early 1980s. Then he turned his attention to fantasy and the first volume in his Wheel of Time epic, "The Eye of the World," was published in 1990 under the name Robert Jordan.

Jordan's books tells of Rand al'Thor, who is destined to become the champion who will battle ultimate evil in a mythical land.

Book 11, "Knife of Dreams," came out in 2005; there was also a prequel, "New Spring: The Novel," in 2004. The other titles in the series include "The Great Hunt," "Lord of Chaos" and "The Path of Daggers." Jordan was working on a 12th volume at the time of his death, Simons said.

In a 2004 online chat on the USA Today Web site, Jordan said he hoped to finish the main "Wheel" series in two more books. Most of the books made The New York Times list of best sellers.

A graduate of The Citadel, South Carolina's state military college, Rigney worked as a nuclear engineer at the old Charleston Naval Shipyard before taking up writing full time in 1977. He served two tours of duty with the Army in Vietnam. He was decorated several times, including winning the Distinguished Flying Cross and the Bronze Star.

Monday, September 17

How do you like me now?

So I saw this over at Sherpa's and had a strong desire to copy it. Which is your favorite me?

1. MY ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet & current car)

Baby Metro (I knew there was a reason I should buy a car.)

2. MY GANGSTA NAME: (fave ice cream flavor, favorite cookie)

Peach Snickerdoodle (Why do my names resemble hookers?)

3. MY “FLY Guy/Girl” NAME: (first initial of first name, first three letters of your last name)

R-Gif

4. MY DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal)

Teal stallion

5. MY SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)

Rae Pocatello
(not having a middle name, I fell back on what I’m called when I’m in trouble…Rachel Rae…)

6. MY STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first)

GifRa

7. MY SUPERHERO NAME: (”The” + 2nd favorite color, favorite drink)

The Green Cherry Coke (something tells me I would end up in Hero Support. Lol!)

8. MY NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers)

Homer Lavaughn (or LaVaughn Homer…either way we are ready for NASCAR!)

9. MY WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother’s & father’s middle names)

Sue Ray (How awful is that, I think I would rather be killed by whoever was hunting me. Lol!)

10. MY TV WEATHER ANCHOR NAME: (Your 5th grade teacher’s last name, a major city that starts with the same letter)

Reuban Reykjavik (I sound male, that is not so good, hopefully the viewing audience would know I wasn’t)

11. MY SPY NAME: (your favorite season/holiday, flower)

St Patrick Lilac (Sounds like a good healthy catholic girl…right? Lol!)

12. MY CARTOON NAME: (favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now + “ie” or “y”)

Peach turtleneckie (sigh something tells me my show would have been cancelled)

13. MY HIPPY NAME: (What you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree)

Bagel Blue Spruce (never was able to pull of the granola girl thing, oh well)

14. MY ROCKSTAR TOUR NAME: (”The” + your fave hobby/craft, fave weather element + “Tour”)

The Reading Storm Tour (Oh gosh even my rockstar tour name sounds like a tour of librarians…I am such a geek. Lol!)

Sunday, September 16

A night with the Mormons....

I started writing about my day off, while sitting at the base of the Washington Monument on Thursday. I learned so much it is hard to get it in to one post….I will post it soon.

I skipped the Renascence Fair in Annapolis today, but that didn't make my day any less interesting...

Joy and I went to see a fellow Mormon Jjana Valentiner in her one woman show called Funeral Potatoes. (Plot: A Mormon family coming to terms with the loss of a grandpa who wasn’t such a good man.) I thoroughly enjoyed it. I was a little worried at first; the theater was tiny, more like a back room then a theater. But the show was one that really resonated with me. All the main types of Mormon women were present: the rebellious daughter who has been banished to a desert camp after her parents found pot in her dresser; the jack Mormon aunt, the Mom, who happens to be the wife of a bishop and can do a million things all at once and of course, the quiet and obedient daughter. It was an interesting moment for me as I listened to the monologue about the confusion of the obedient daughter. Not to say I was ever obedient or quiet, but I remember thinking the exact same thoughts at various times in my life. I mean doesn’t everyone? I don't know about you, but I didn't get 'the talent' expected of most Mormon women. I am not a one woman show who can make a meal for the family...and the sick neighbors family, placate a husband, prep the lesson for Sunday, tie a quilt, make sure the house is clean, feed the kids, shop for groceries, AND still have time for scripture study, FHE lessons, and personal time with each kid. Nor did I get 'the looks', not to say I am ugly, because I definitely have some good features but I am not ever going to be a size 4 that will stop traffic, though in reality I don’t think I would ever really want to. Sorry tangent there….back to the play….It was a fabulous look at the struggle of the individual family members.

Joy and I discussed it on the metro ride home. One of the opinions that we share was a that Jjana really understood the characters she was portraying. Sometimes people try to write or act a character they don’t understand; unfortunately, when that happens they fall back on the stereotypes. Mormons, as with every other culture, have their stereotypes that are easily exploited but if you don’t understand the characters that you are portraying, what was meant to be a funny poke at a stereotype can come across as mean and offensive. In tonight’s show there were definitely funny pokes at various realistic stereotypes, there was no offense intended and none taken. Also, I think this play was a really interesting look at the “Madonna/Whore complex” in society. I think Jjana did a great job showing us that people are never all good or all bad. We are all a mix of both, doing the best we can with what we’ve got. Jjana said that the show is a work in progress and I hope I get a chance to see it again once it has evolved.

Once home, I ended up watching a movie with Jen and Gina in which 2 of the main male characters in the movie were supposed to be Mormon. One was a young boy preparing for an LDS mission, the other one was “taking a break” from the faith. It wasn’t a bad portrayal, even if the young guy was a little hokey. It was an interesting movie, though the plot was a bit heavy and we had to fast forward through parts of it. Lol!

To round out my Mormon evening…I ended up on the phone with one of my girlfriends. A good friend of hers is attending our church for the first time. They have been having some pretty heavy gospel discussion tonight and she called to chat (i.e. have a small freak out session. Lol!).

Now I am going to hit the hay. 3 hours of church tomorrow will kill me if I don’t get at least a little sleep…lol…a Mormon’s work is never done. Lol!